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Author and Advocate for Healthy Sexuality and Spirituality

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Hot Tips For Sexually Confident Wives #67

05/31/2019 by ShannonAdmin

Hot Tips For Sexually Confident Wives #67

Take Responsibility For Your Own Pleasure!

Confession: Recently I’ve found myself getting a little annoyed with women. Not just any women, but passive women. Of course, it’s not the WOMEN who are annoying to me, it’s the PASSIVITY!

For example, I’ve heard the following complaints by three different women:

  • * My husband doesn’t kiss me often enough when we have sex.
  • * My husband doesn’t even take off my shirt to make love to me.
  • * My husband doesn’t know how to hold the marital aid to make me orgasm.

Do you catch on to what’s really happening here? All of these complaints begin with “My husband…”

Since when is it a husband’s responsibility to read his wife’s mind and do exactly what she wants him to do at every turn? There’s simply no way he can win at that game! And as a result, his wife doesn’t win either. She’s too focused on what he’s doing or not doing to recognize her role in this dynamic.

What if WE were to take the initiative to fulfill our own pleasurable desires? I’m not talking about retreating to the bathtub for a solo masturbatory experience. I’m talking about DOING whatever you want to do, not waiting in frustration that HE isn’t doing a certain something FOR you!

Instead of negatively critiquing your husband’s sexual performance, take responsibility for your own pleasure!

  • * Instead of: “My husband doesn’t kiss me often enough when we have sex.” Try: “I love to smother my husband with soft, wet kisses!”
  • * Instead of: “My husband doesn’t even take off my shirt to make love to me.” Try: “I strip off every piece of clothing on my way to the bed, making sure he knows I want some big-time skin-to-skin action!”
  • * Instead of: “My husband doesn’t know how to hold the marital aid to make me orgasm.” Try: “I let him have all the fun he wants with the marital aid, then I give him a hand and free him up to do other fun things to my body!”

Funny how men tend to do this intuitively. If he wants something in bed, he asks for it… or just goes for it. No pouting. No whining. No complaining. No disillusionment or disappointment. (If that’s not true for your husband, have him read this hot tip, reversing the roles in his mind!)

So ladies (and gentlemen), please don’t expect your spouse to read your mind in bed! SPEAK your mind instead! Take responsibility for your own pleasure and encourage your partner to do the same.


Wishing you more pleasure than you fathomed possible,

Shannon

Miss Part of the Series?

Hot Tip #1
Hot Tip #2
Hot Tip #3
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Hot Tip #66

 

Excerpted from The Sexually Confident Wife: Connecting with Your Husband Mind*Body*Heart*Spirit by Shannon Ethridge. Copyright 2008.  All Rights Reserved. Published by Random House Inc, New York, NY. Used by Permission. Not to be copied without Publisher’s prior written approval. 

 

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