5.  Avoid unrealistic comparisons.

Comparing ourselves to other people is natural, but not always healthy. Pay attention to what it does to your self-esteem. For example, if you go to the mall on a Friday night and compare yourself to the teen girls in their low-rise jeans and tight tees, you may find yourself in the dumps before dinner time.  But return the next morning and compare yourself to the blue-haired, arthritic retirees walking laps around the mall in their Reeboks, and your self esteem will most likely soar.

I’m not throwing a stone here.  When I spend all day around my daughter’s friends, I can get self-conscious about my size and shape if I’m not very careful to guard my thoughts. I have to remember that I’m not sixteen anymore, and I wouldn’t go back there again even if you paid me an insane amount of money!  But when I used to spend the day visiting my grandparents at the nursing home where they resided, I often returned home feeling like the hottest thing on the planet.

6.  Choose your vocabulary wisely.

Never underestimate the power of your words. They can make everyone around you (especially yourself) feel terrific or terrible. How you talk about yourself teaches other people how to look at you, as well as how to treat you. And the words you use to describe your body can make or break your own sexual confidence.Therefore, if you have a larger than average physique, don’t call yourself “fat” or “chubby.”  Try “voluptuous” instead. If you’re not a frou-frou glamour girl, don’t call yourself “plain Jane.” You’re a “natural beauty.” If your breasts are on the small side, don’t use the term “flat-chested.” Instead, try describing your build as “trim” or “athletic.” If your body isn’t as toned as you’d like it to be, you don’t have to call yourself “flabby.” You’re just “soft.”  Lots of men like soft, or trim, or natural, or voluptuous. And they are far more likely to love those attributes when you celebrate them as well.