The secret to having the marriage of your dreams is understanding the need for “sexual balance” in the relationship. To help you understand this concept, let’s look at what I call the “Seesaw of Sexuality.” Our sexuality has four unique components: the physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual. While every individual is comprised of these four components, two seem to be more important to the male soul, and the other two weigh heavier with the female soul, creating a “seesaw” effect that looks something like this:
Keeping these components of our sexual relationship in balance is an art form and the goal of the sexually confident wife. If things get out of balance one way or another, either the husband or the wife can feel cheated and used. She can feel like nothing more than a piece of meat because he’s getting his physical needs met while she starves emotionally. Or he feels like her little lapdog. She’s getting lots of his time and attention, but he gets nothing more than a pat on the head to meet his physical needs.
A sexually confident wife will not only be able to maintain a balance between his needs and her needs, but she’ll also recognize how they all work together to create synergy in the relationship. It’s no longer about keeping score or who’s getting their own way. It’s about how the physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual are all combining to form a magical elixir that keeps them both intoxicated with passion for one another.
Excerpted from The Sexually Confident Wife: Connecting with Your Husband Mind*Body*Heart*Spirit* by Shannon Ethridge. Copyright 2008. All Rights Reserved. Published by Random House Inc, New York, NY. Used by Permission. Not to be copied without Publisher’s prior written approval.